Getting Tea Drunk on Super Rare Tea for Chinese New Year’s

Celebrating the New Year with Killer Company

I’ve just driven up to the new Wudang Cultural Heritage Center, located in the Oakland Hills. We’re celebrating the Year of the Water Tiger. I was invited by my buddy Patrick who wanted to grab footage of a very special tea ceremony with Kung-Fu master, David Wei, who I haven’t seen in a long time.

When I walk up, David immediately makes me feel welcome, and it’s also clear he’s holding court. David is a big dude, like 6’ 7”. He’s an imposing figure sitting in his dragon throne.

I kid you not. It’s an honest to god throne covered in dragon carvings.

Sorry I can’t tell you what we talk about next because it’s classified. Let’s just say, it’s the stuff you only talk about in special company.

Anyhow, our group of six is sitting around a 500 year old table, that was gifted to him by his tea master. It’s filled with tea snacks and all the finest tea ware.

The group consists of his wife and 10 month old kid, a bubbly boy who smiles easily. Anoah sits on my left. He’s a kid in his early twenties, and the son of David’s deceased tea master. Like most millennials, he’s checking his tech. Jonah, a masseuse, is showing us his cardamom massage oil as David prepares the puer tea. Puer is rarely drank by westerners, but its aged for smoothness and collected like fine wine. Then David explains why this puer it’s so special.

It’s called 301, and it’s a very rare puer blend, comprised of 2 puers from the 80s and 2 from the 70s. This tea is the last tea he drank with his master before he died. For those who don’t know their puer, that’s cray cray!

It’s like drinking Petrus a fine red wine that goes for $700 a bottle. The first steeping has a the distinct musty flavor. Puer is long lasting, and is steeped numerous times. For instance, three hours later, we’ll have steeped it over twenty times, with each steeping revealing another facet of the tea.

The group ebbs and flows. Then Patrick, my pal, shows up. He’s an illustrator whose just launched his Kickstarter campaign and got 170% funding in two days for his comic “A Tiger’s Tale”. He comes bearing gifts, as is common in Chinese culture.

While we’re sitting there, Patrick leaves his mark in the guest book. It’s a killer illustration of a tiger that he gifts to David.

It’s a surreal setting and the conversation is eclectic and highly philosophical.

The time flies, and the tea flows. Soon we’re “tea drunk” and experiencing that state of elation that comes from drinking a crapton of tea.

The next thing I know I’m out by the Olympic size swimming pool shooting Anoah smoking a puer cigarette for his social media account.

Who knew you could smoke tea cigarettes? And it’s surprisingly smooth.

Then we’re inside and I’m shooting some crazy massage kung-fu that works the spine over, since they do body work here too.

Then its time to leave.

It’s been an awesome day.

Absolutely primo.

I can’t wait to come back and see the evolving studio. When its finished, it’s going to be a VERY special place where students can practice their KungFu, and drink the finest tea with kindred spirits.

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Donovan Rittenbach - Copywriter, AI Jockey

Donovan is a Master of Multimedia, technomage, and copywriter. He's an expert trainer teaching business people to use generative AI.